Satisfy Your Sexual Appetite: Why Building a Sex Menu Helps (Plus a Guide and Printable Worksheet) by Jaimie Keillor, RCC

It’s completely understandable if talking about sexual preferences, fantasies, or desires feels

overwhelming or even a little awkward. You’re definitely not alone—lots of partners feel like

something is missing in their sex life, but they just don’t know how to start the conversation or

how to bring up something new. This is really normal. Most of us didn’t grow up with open

conversations about intimacy, so it makes sense that it can feel a bit daunting.

That's where the concept of a sex menu can be so valuable. I like to introduce this idea because

it’s a gentle and practical way to figure out what you want and to open up the conversation with

your partner(s). The great thing about a sex menu is that it’s simple and flexible. Sex can look

however you and your partner want it to- it doesn’t have to be the same every time, unless that’s

what you both enjoy. For a lot of people, adding a little variety or trying something new can bring

back excitement and help you feel more connected.

Creating a sex menu together gives you a structured but approachable way to talk about your

interests and boundaries. When you lay out different options, it becomes much easier to share

what you’re curious about or even what you’re unsure of. This process helps both people feel

seen and respected. As you explore these choices together, you might discover new desires,

and you’ll also be building trust and understanding along the way. When you’re both clear about

what you want and where your boundaries are, it naturally brings you closer and helps your

relationship feel more like a team effort.

A sex menu can also take away some of the uncertainty that sometimes comes up in intimate

moments. When you know what each other likes and doesn’t like, there’s less fear of rejection

or misunderstanding, and it’s easier to relax and enjoy being together. In the end, a sex menu is

just a supportive tool to help you have these important conversations and to navigate your

intimate life together!

Here is a worksheet to help you curate your own sexual menu!